One less, many more...

Coffee-less?

How is that possible?
I live coffee...

But one week ago, I chose to fast coffee just to see if I can do without it.
And today, it is day 10! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

I used to walk to my kitchen cabinet and grab my fav Nescafe when I want a drink.
I used to walk into a cafe and immediately look at the 'coffee'  menu.
Now, I paused and read the menu.
I take longer to decide on my drink.
But I start realizing that there are other options on the menu.

To do without, I realize there are others.
One less, many more.

"I don't care"

"Yes, I really don't care"

Should I be bothered by what you think? 

Should I care about how you look at me? 

Does it really matter?

"I don't care"

Easier said than done.

The human is naturally inclined to care... 

Or just ke-poh...

We stop at a Facebook post to see what others are doing. 

We check the number of likes we have on Instagram.

We see the views we have on Snapchat.

And inside we all know that it doesn't really matter.

We stop to see the accident at the shoulder of the road.

We turn our heads when a child start crying in the restaurant. 

Or a couple fighting in public.

Could we really not care? 

"Maybe not"

"I just have to care"

It affects me. 

To care and not to care the same.

The former is vulnerable.

The latter drains. 

Consciously or unconsciously.

I guess I still care.

Who am I?

If authentic is 100%, how would I rate myself?
Is the outside 'me' still the same 'me'?
What have I become?
Is it really still 'me'?

The recent years, I have been asking that question to myself more...
"Who am I?"
Have I lost myself to the mould that society expect?
Even if the mould is the church?

"Fake it till you make it"
Really?
I have faked it till I'm now fake.

Can I not be nice just because society expect it from me?
Can I just be free and not do anything?
Just because I can doesn't mean I have to.

I have a voice...
I am 'me'.

But, where is that voice?
Where has the 'me' gone to?